Friday, January 28, 2011

Surrender to Love?

This little girl has jumped on the wings of love and is flying off to the unknown. Love is unknown. I have been in love many times and continue to fall in love everyday! It is not the couples love but the love of moments, things and animals and children. The love I felt and still feel for my Granddaughters is unlike any other. They are MY children once removed but in my soul they are as much mine as they are their parents. I would die for them and everyday try to make their life better in anyway I can. Love for things is so different not permanent and on a different level. I love the instant feeling some of my collectibles give me. They open a door of imagination about where they came from and if they could talk what they could say. They are pretty but sometimes I tire of them and hide them away for a while. The love for my animals is hard to describe to someone if they don't feel the same about the little critters as I do. My animals ask just for the basics, never question me and always want to please me, well as much as cats can do what you want them to. I have had many cats in my life and at one time had 6. Only 2 were ask to live with us and the rest just moved in for various reasons. They are so loving and special it would be hard for me to imagine my life without a cat in it. So many loves, all different and all still changing as I get older. I think I feel love a bit more deeply as my time on this planet shortens. I strive to enjoy all loves as intensely as I can. I like to think unlike this wide eyed girl in my drawing I was never afraid to Surrender to love. Of course doing this has left me with bits and pieces missing from my heart. But so those of you that are afraid to surrender, go ahead but use your head as well as your heart and enjoy every moment as it goes by very fast!

Monday, January 24, 2011


I mentioned in this picture that Mirabella chose the easy way out when cleaning her house. I too have chosen the easy way out this week. I'm busy finishing some paintings for an Art Gallery that is showing them for me. I have been touching some of them up as one or two of my creations are not new and I'm finishing the edges of the canvases. I don't know what inspired me to do this drawing ha ha of course I do as it is my way. I did have an odd thought this morning( that has nothing to do with the topic) that I should remove from my china cabinet my Grandmothers cut glass crystal pitcher that she received as a wedding present. Why protect it and hide it away? I will enjoy it and put it in the center of my farm table, shining and reminding me of all of my wonderful ancestors. My Grandmother never had much in the material way but her treasure was my Father. He was the only child and my Grandfather died when my Father was 9 years old. Nana as we called her, worked many jobs to make ends meet from teaching to accounting and being a nanny for others children,not forgetting being a Rosy the riveter during the war. She was at one time a young woman of means and enjoyed the life of a girl growing up in the 1900's. She was very crafty too and painted her wedding china, did needlepoint and studied handwriting in later years. She moved many times from Kansas to Florida to finely ended up in California. We have many items that she carefully protected from her wedding present list. My Mother told me that she gave her the cut glass pitcher and a large bowl that matched. Mom didn't really like Nana and didn't have the same reverence for the items and left the pitcher out in the yard after having flowers in it. I guess as the story goes, Nana quietly brought it in and washed it and put it back where it lived when not being used. I think if it had been me the pitcher would have been in my purse on the way back to where it would be appreciated! But times were different then and that would have not looked good for my Grandmother to take it back. She lived a full life always kept herself busy and I don't remember her ever complaining about anything. I hope I have inherited some of her grace and composer. God knows I try but sometimes I just want to.......we will leave that for your interpretation. So today when I look at the glass picture I will remember the life that was lived many years ago and as I have often wished, wish again I could have know all of my relatives when they were young and experiencing their everyday existence. Would they have laughed at what we find funny? Would we have been friends? That is a question never to be answered....but I still can wonder can't I?

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Winter wonderland...

I don't have to much experience with winter weather. I believe that snow is an unnatural state for water to be in. I remember the first time as a teen I had been to the snow and wore my sandals, not thinking I might need something more to protect my feet. My Mother always made me wear many layers of clothes under my Halloween costumes and I felt just like the little child in my picture. How do you move this way...its funny I now have some unwanted pounds and they feel a little like an extra bit of clothes. If we could only remove them as easy as getting undressed! I feel like I am getting a cold as most of the family has one is some form or the other. I will drink lots of liquids and make some chicken soup you know it is good for the soul....Fog has just rolled is high and the wind is cold....enough weather report.....all is almost good but better than most....I am thankful for all I have......

Monday, January 17, 2011


I spied this Chicken in a magazine from England. I thought she was beautiful and I loved her outlined feathers. I decided that being so beautiful she must lay colorful eggs, so colorful they are. I think chickens are pretty great creatures and wish we could have them running through our backyard. But not in this city and besides the Racoon's that party at my house would so enjoy a chicken dinner. I love the creatures here and offer them freely food and shelter as needed. Our city has grown so much there is no place for the wild creatures to live any more. There were fields and space many years ago but with the building that has gone on that space has disappeared. Often people complain about the animals and I stand firmly that WE have taken their space and should make allowances for them. I think we still have enough wild and wonderful yards to do them just fine. I did cringe when after 3 years of protecting my gold fish that had grown to be large and plump, became dinner one spring night. But on the whole we coexist very well....My Sister and family were down this weekend and we enjoyed their company and laughed a lot. My oldest Niece is home from MIT with her Brazilian boyfriend she met in Brazil last summer. He is really nice and since my Son married a wonderful girl from ,where else? but Brazil it is fun. I tease my Daughter-in-law that the Brazilians have a plot to take over Southern California. Four or five of my Son's friends from high school have married girls from there. I love listening to Portuguese and find it a delightful sounding language... Today feels like Summer and I have the french doors flung open to catch the breeze and help the windchimes to make their music.....Here lately we don't know how to dress, it is raining hard and cold one day and the next day is warm and sunny.....bought new ink to print my valentines cards for a store I sell to near by and the ink won't print RED...makes me unhappy and will have to run to return it and get a new one. I always think when things don't go quite right it is to remind me to S L O W....down and don't always be in such a hurry. So I am S L O W I N G down and enjoying the moment...I will sit in the Sun a while....sniff...the breeze....and put one foot in front of the other........

Monday, January 3, 2011


It has always fascinated me how we humans get up each morning and put one foot in front of the other and carry on. I find it hard sometimes to want to do just that. And then I remember others have physical and metal burdens to deal with and I find the energy to carry on. Getting along with everyone has never been a problem for me. But now as I get older I'm able to step back and really watch others as they try to manipulate their way through life. Most of the ones I know that want to control others actually have and have had no control in their lives. They are not happy when they hear the word NO....what did you say? I imagine they are thinking.... I don't respond to NO...they are thinking. I have never wanted to control anyone else but myself and don't always do a good job of that. So watching these control freaks has been eye opening on many levels. I feel sad at their disappointment when they don't get their way and wish I could make their lives happier, but I know that happiness comes from inside of ourselves. I want so much for others to be happy with all the blessings they have been given and savor each day as if it was their last. Loosing my Father when he was 60 was hard on me. I loved him so but we had no regrets between each other. All words were said and as much as I would loved to have him here to share my life and see his great Grand kids I knew it was his time. Its funny each of the Great grand kids have seen my Father in one way or the other. Each event was subtle and seemed just matter of fact to the kids. All of the adults have just smiled and knew it was just as it was. He is remembered everyday and is strong in our memories. He lived his life to the fullest and I hope I'm doing the same. So I will TRY to understand and be better in watching the different ones in my life....names and faces have been changed to protect the innocent....carry on humans just one foot in front of the other.....and forward we go............